the price is wrong bob….

The big monkey wrench in the life’s grand exhibition is that everything has a price….. drugs, though they thwart certain health problems and alter our fucked up matrix reality, have terrible side affects. great tasting food, though inexpensive and quick to cook, clogs arteries and kills you and your appearance. smoking, while it looks cool and calms nerves,  is the worst of all of these; slow suicide….

ahh. life’s poetic justice. our universe serves us up these nefarious side dishes by the boatload. below are more “interesting” examples of life’s price/bitch slap. enjoy.

a) propecia helps bald dudes grow hair but lowers libido to nonexistent levels. so by the time the guy’s looking good enough to bang that “hot younger chick” he has zero desire. my friend said thats “cruel”. i said that its “hilarious”.

b) only once you’ve grown old do you truly appreciate the benefits of being young. thus the noble quote “youth is wasted on the young”.

c) by the time women find their max libido theyre prob already are married with kids. aka. off the shelf, far less physically appealing, and much too busy and responsible to chase tail. i cant think of a noble quote for this.  why women and men cant both be 35 at time of peak performance (+ genetic sustainability/ screw darwin) ..we’ll never know. mars and venus ahve been battling ever since…

d) by the time you can afford to wear all the best, most expensive fashions featured in the likes of vogue/harpars bazarre/elle magazine… youre too old to wear them.. $6500 sequine beaded leather hot pants and $2000 spiked heel platform pumps dont look so good on seniors.

e) by the time youre legal to drink as much as you want you know that going out and getting wasted and hammered is pointless. and dangerous. (actually a lot of people over 21 havent realized this). sadly my crazy days of abandon are now far and few between.

f) the longer your blog entries are the less likely they will be read. once people  know youre the longwinded/depressing/thoughtful/introspective type… thats me,  they run for the hills. quick quotes and bunny pics are far more accessible and enjoyable. …yes i do know this despite eyesofodysseus’ (thats a mouthful) daily content…

so im signing off.

abruptly.

love,

odie mama.

…do you have any other examples to share? comments welcome.

Advertisements

PLEASE SHARE YOUR COMMENTS;

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s