The predictive text/autocorrect on my phone is constantly fighting me. I type thoughtful, cohesive, clearly intentioned sentences and it goes ahead and mangles them leaving behind phrases littered with the tortured carcasses of correctly spelled, completely illsuited, words for you, the reader, to struggle through.
And you thought this whole time my blog was littered with typos because my cat Odie was assigned proofreading duties (but was too busy sunbathing and chewing on his dental wizard toys) to get the job done. Nope. Well not quite.
Yes, I admit I gave him the proofreading duties, but he always passed them back to me. And I dutifully passed them on to technology. its been my nut do smartphones fault ever since.
but todays is a new dawn in blogville! I’ve grown tired of fighting the auto correct and will not be correcting its correcting. well just for today.
Why give up now you ask? I have no choice. I can’t go back to using a using blackberry tactile keyboard because unfortunately its attached to a blackberry phone. Option 2 is another non option because I haven’t yet bought the bluetooth external keyboard to attach to my current phone to type on..So here we are. In the land of grand experiments. I’m excited!
todays blog will be uncorrected + auto corrected. A veritable feat and fest of the insanity that my phone has been wanting me to insert in my final, published blogs since I began pressing them. I will type this entry with abandon. (what I intended to say will be included in parenthesis) Hopefully the blog I wanted is more interesting than the phones? Only one way to find out…let the autocorrect chaos commence.
Let’s start with something easy:
The quick brown fix (fox) jumped over the lazy dog..
We all know what that was supposed to be..
Ok. Now I’ll share my stem (dream) from last night.
Wyatt (what) a crazy dream j (I) had last night. Amelie (somehow) I was standing outside on the ledge of a skyscraper seventy stories up. Then (when) I looked down all I saw was a deep put (pit) of nothingness. Scary add (as) all hell, I can tell you. For some reason there were also two guys that were caught on the ledges with me. I think they were famous. It seemed like Kanye west and p Diddy. I have no idea how we all got there, but we were ask (all) stabbed (stranded) outside on those balconies on the middle of nowhere. And looming (looking) for a way back inside in order to complete some mission we had. I was able to creek (crawl) back inside the massive complex. It was all locked down with security measures of all kind s. Like black opus (ops) type shoot (shit). I made my way into an elevator with one if the guys. Byte (now) that I think about him he looked like Bobby brown , withers (Whitney s) drug asked (addled) ex. He wad (was) going to help me get to the to the floor where the matter (master) executive who controlled the whole building was. Of (oh) ,I SF hotfoot (forgot) to mention or (our) lives wetter (were) in danger because this master control guy in the to (top) of the threw (tower) was trying to kill us. Bobby and I decided we had the best shoot (shot) at killing the master executive guy before he could kill us if we fringed (feigned) getting of (off) on the 26th floor. Then I had the grand idea to press all the buttons on the ejector (elevator) to fill (fool) the bad guy’s bad guys. Maybe this way they’d have no idea which floor we got of (off) in (on) Did it with (work)? Well never know. The dream ended right then and there. No more Bobby to busty (bust) a Diddy (doody) bubble in the master killers fave (face) and DVD (end) the sensation (scenario).
Next week I’ll tell you about the dream where I was at the park and somehow got into this rife (ride) with a tin (ton) of other kids and it worked by having events (everyones) feet hand (hang) out the bottom of the tide (ride) and jump at the sane (same) time and w (we) were launched sky high. It wad (was) Assn (an) credible (incredible) feeling. Like flying Mikes (miles) above the earth.